"That is not a nice thought" - Nathan van Hooydonck admits he still thinks about what could have been after rollercoaster 2023

The cycling world was sent into a state of shock earlier this year when news emerged that Nathan van Hooydonck had suffered a cardiac arrest at the wheel of his car. Although, his professional career was brought to an end, thankfully and most importantly, he survived.

"I regularly think about what could have happened. When I wake up my son in the morning, I realize that I couldn't have been there. Or the three of us. That is not a nice thought," reflects the 28-year-old Belgian to Sporza. "When I walk or cycle, I feel that my condition is no longer what it was. That will never come back and that is hard."

Having spent the last three seasons with Jumbo-Visma, van Hooydonck was a key helper in Jonas Vingegaard's Tour de France successes. Sadly though, due to his enforced retirement, he won't be able to continue on as the team change into Team Visma | Lease a Bike.

"That feeling of getting better is what I will miss most about being a professional. Train hard and work on internships, where you know: if I come down from this mountain, I will be able to hurt a lot of guys in the race. That's the most beautiful thing there was. That physical fitness won't come back," he admits sadly.

Van Hooydonck has already been propositioned for a return to cycling in a behind-the-scenes role, although he's not sure just yet. "A lot of people approach me and then I think about whether this or that is something for me. Staying within cycling is my comfort zone, but outside the race is real life. But outside cycling, so many things appeal to me and I want to find out whether they suit me," he explains. "The cycling fairy tale has ended, but real life begins now. I'm 28. One career is over, but I can still start other careers."

"If I want to do anything with my life, I have to do it myself. There are also days when I would rather stay in bed and I allow that too. If I feel this way, then that's the way it is. But I try to do things that I enjoy. Maybe I'm going too fast and I'll have to slow down in a few months, but for now I'm trying to look at what the future can bring," concludes the Belgian. "We are spoiled as riders, everything is done for us. We make the sacrifices because we enjoy doing them. When I see how much happiness our son brings us, I can't be unhappy. He provides so much love and warmth."